[Verse 1]
Old Godzilla was hopping around
Tokyo city like a big playground
When suddenly Batman burst from the shade
And hit Godzilla with a bat grenade
Godzilla got pissed and began to attack
But didn't expect to be blocked by Shaq
Who proceeded to open up a can of Shaq-Fu
When Aaron Carter came out of the blue
And he started beating up Shaquille O'Neal
Then they both got flattened by the Batmobile
But before it could make it back to the Batcave
Abraham Lincoln popped out of his grave
And took an AK-47 out from under his hat
And blew Batman away with a rat-a-tat-tat
But he ran out of bullets and he ran away
Because Optimus Prime came to save the day

[Chorus]
This is the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny
Good guys, bad guys and explosions, as far as the eye can see
And only one will survive, I wonder who it will be
This is the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny

[Verse 2]
Godzilla took a bite out of Optimus Prime
Like Scruff McGruff took a bite out of crime
And then Shaq came back covered in a tire track
But Jackie Chan jumped out and landed on his back
And Batman was injured and trying to get steady
When Abraham Lincoln came back with a machete
But suddenly something caught his leg and he tripped
Indiana Jones took him out with his whip
Then he saw Godzilla sneaking up from behind
And he reached for his gun which he just couldn't find
'Cause Batman stole it and he shot and he missed
And Jackie Chan deflected it with his fist
Then he jumped in the air and he did a somersault
While Abraham Lincoln tried to pole vault
Onto Optimus Prime but they collided in the air
Then they both got hit by a Care Bear stare

[Chorus]
This is the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny
Good guys, bad guys and explosions, as far as the eye can see
And only one will survive, I wonder who it will be
This is the ultimate showdown

[Bridge]
Angels sang out an immaculate chorus
Down from the heavens descended Chuck Norris
Who delivered a kick which could shatter bones
Into the crotch of Indiana Jones
Who fell over on the ground, writhing in pain
As Batman changed back into Bruce Wayne
But Chuck saw through his clever disguise
And he crushed Batman's head in between his thighs

[Verse 3]
Then Gandalf the Grey and Gandalf the White
And Monty Python and the Holy Grail's black knight
And Benito Mussolini, and the Blue Meanie
And Cowboy Curtis, and Jambi The Genie
Robocop, The Terminator, Captain Kirk, and Darth Vader
Lo-pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger
Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan
Spock, The Rock, Doc Ock, and Hulk Hogan
All came out of nowhere lightning fast
And they kicked Chuck Norris in his cowboy ass
It was the bloodiest battle that the world ever saw
With civilians looking on in total awe
The fight raged on for a century
Many lives were claimed but eventually
The champion stood, the rest saw their better
Mr. Rogers in a blood-stained sweater

[Chorus]
This is the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny
Good guys, bad guys and explosions, as far as the eye can see
And only one will survive, I wonder who it will be
This is the ultimate showdown (This is the ultimate showdown)
This is the ultimate showdown (This is the ultimate showdown)
This is the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny

Howie thought brass was the height of style
Now he's got something of a steampunk smile
And it's all right, it's alright, it's alright
Sally got a dagger hung from her septum
O'Malley cut his ears off, but wishes that he kept 'em
And it's alright
It's all right to be cool, you do what you do, what you do
Rooney got his skull exposed, doggone it
Soon he's gonna get scrimshaw carved on it
And it's alright
It's alright to be cool, it's alright, it's alright

Do what you want with you
Be nonchalant with screws
Stuck through your eyelids
You new wave of pirates

Modify, modify whatever
Modify, modify and sever
Modify
May nothing get rejected
May nothing get infected

Mason got Frankenstein stitches installed
Adjacent to her eyes cause she wants to look mauled
And it's alright, it's alright, it's alright
Johnny stuck 20 gauge nails through his feet
Donnie stuck 40 if only to compete
And it's alright
It's all right to be cool, you do what you do, what you do
Stan tried to scarify his neck with a rope
His plan kinda failed, but it would've been dope
And it's alright
It's alright to be cool, it's alright, it's alright

Do what you want with you
Be nonchalant with screws
Stuck through your eyelids
You new wave of pirates

Modify, modify whatever
Modify, modify and sever
Modify
May nothing get rejected
May nothing get infected

Modify, modify whatever
Modify, modify and sever
Modify
May nothing get rejected (Knock yourself out)
May nothing get infected